By Debbie Haine Vijayvergiya

Words matter just ask Girl Scout Troop 20923.

The troop, comprised of sixth-graders from Maplewood and South Orange, has spent the past year cultivating a grass-roots advocacy effort, #IWILL.

They are asking that Girl Scouts of the USA (GSUSA) modify the Girl Scout Promise and Law to be more empowering for girls everywhere.

#IWILL was born out of a Womens Leadership conference troop co-leader Jaime Barnes attended where she heard Dr. Cindy Wahler, psychologist and expert in human behavior, speak about female communication style.

Dr. Wahler shared that women, juxtaposed to men, often resist self-promotion and use communication tags, or indirect language, when offering insights or contributions to discussions. By doing this, women inadvertently and often unconsciously diminish the strength of their message and their brand.

She went on to use the Girl Scout Promise and Law vs the Boy Scout Oath and Law as an example of how ingrained this is in our language and our culture.

The Boy Scout Oath states, I will and the Girl Scout Promise says, I will try; The Boy Scout Law states, A Scout is and the Girl Scout Law says, I will do my best to be.

Her talk was eye opening for Ms. Barnes, her co-leader, Catherine DOrazio, and their troop. Before coming to any conclusions, the troop did their own research to understand what Dr. Wahler was referring to.

They began by observing the behaviors of their classmates, both girls and boys. The results were astounding. They noticed that boys were quicker to answer questions and stated their responses with confidence. In contrast, girls in their classrooms tended to hang back, hesitate when called on, and had a hard time expressing their thoughts in a concise manner.

The troop also researched women in leadership positions across business, entertainment and politics and were dismayed to learn that women still hold a minority of these important roles across all sectors of our society.

In the end, Troop 20923 recognized Dr. Wahlers point and unanimously agreed that things had to change! Originally, the troop leaders were only going to modify the promise and law for their troop. But the Troop felt a sense of responsibility to the Girl Scout community and decided to raise awareness for all Girl Scouts.

Troop 20923 observing the behaviors of their classmates, noticing that boys were quicker to answer questions and stated their responses with confidence. In contrast, girls tended to hesitate when called on, and had a hard time expressing their thoughts in a concise manner.

Their request is simple - that GSUSA revise the Girl Scout Law and Promise by eliminating the words try and do my best to be more inspiring and confidence-instilling. Even though the edits are minor, Troop 20923 is confident that the impact on the Girl Scout community will be major.

As the troop leaders explained, 'try is just three letters, but it has serious implications to how girls value themselves and what we, as a society, expect of them. An organization with a mission to develop "girls of courage, confidence, and character should not continue using language that inadvertently and potentially unconsciously, diminishes girls strength and confidence.

When Juliette Gordon Low founded GSUSA in 1912, she envisioned an organization to prepare girls to meet their world with courage, confidence, and character." Girls Scouts is one of the most prominent leadership development organizations for girls today. With over 2 million members, GSUSA has an obligation to shape this next generation of girls and women so that they can have the success and achievement they desire and deserve.

No, more than ever, its important that we send the right messages to girls, so that our future leaders have the confidence to express themselves with authority and assurance.

Speaking for myself, I sincerely hope that Troop 20923 gets the opportunity to be heard. Theyve written letters to GSUSA and submitted a formal request through Girl Scouts Heart of New Jersey for inclusion in the G.I.R.L. 2020 Convention. A change like this can only be achieved through a vote at the tri-annual convention. They are now working on getting the word out and building support for #IWILL. The troop is doing their part, so please do yours.

Dr. Cindy Wahler said it best, These girls are our role models for both our current and future generations! They have courage and are bold. Please show them having a voice matters. Empower them to make a difference by signing their petition.

Debbie Haine Vijayvergiya is a stillbirth parent advocate. She lives in Maplewood with her husband and two kids.

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Why is it that boy scouts will, but girl scouts try? Change the Promise, please. | Opinion - NJ.com