Once the therapy was complete, his father let Bowen go to New York University, where his sister, already a student there, could chaperone him.

The irony of it all is I went to the gayest undergrad in the country, he says, smiling, about his alma mater, which he mocks in stand-up routines as a real estate firm, celebrity day care center and a multicomplex head-shot studio.

I spent freshman year trying straightness on for size and failing miserably, he says. I sort of tricked myself into having a crush on a girl but it was just kind of a weird, weird, weird pit stop. Then I would look at a boy and be like, Oh, I want to talk to him. Mr. Yang has a tattoo on his arm, drawn by a nonbinary Chinese tattoo artist, with ancient signets. They represent his parents last names. He never got mad at them.

I had this second coming out with them while I was in college and went through this whole flare-up again with them, where they couldnt accept it, Mr. Yang says. And then eventually, I just got to this place of standing firm and being like, This is sort of a fixed point, you guys. I cant really do anything about this. So either you meet me here or you dont meet me.

It never got to the point of, I wont come home again. I was just like, Im not going to argue with them. Like my dad every now and then will be like, So, when are you going to meet a girl? And Ill just calmly be like, Dad, its not going to happen. I mean, its O.K. Both my parents are doing a lot of work to just try to understand and I cant rush them. I cant resent them for not arriving at any place sooner than theyre able to get there.

His parents and sister proudly came to his first show as a cast member last fall.

Bowen went to pre-med classes, got a chemistry degree, and took the MCAT, partly influenced by the character played by his idol Sandra Oh on Greys Anatomy.

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Bowen Yang of S.N.L. Is a Smash. And a Mensch. - The New York Times