2020 brought unprecedented challenges for millions of people, but how we talk about our distress, pain and problems can help us cope.

Why it matters: Conversation "partners help, collaborate and validate us as we try to put into words what in some ways are unspeakable difficulties," says Denise Solomon, who studies interpersonal communication at Penn State University.

The big picture: Some researchers are calling for neuroscientists and communication scientists to collaborate in studying our conversations to more precisely understand what happens in our brains when we interact and try to support one another.

How it works: Supportive conversations can relieve stress and improve our emotions.

But the content of a conversation is key.

How a conversation unfolds is important, too.

But it's important to listen because advice often isn't what people are looking for, says Amanda Holmstrom, who studies interpersonal communication at Michigan State University.

The flip side: There's a lot of pressure on the listener, but the teller plays an important role. "Disclosers have to be willing to tell their story and be receptive to the help even recognizing their experience may be so specific and extreme that no one else has ever experienced it," says Solomon.

One potential pitfall: Conversations can devolve into rumination and co-rumination. We can get stuck in these "cul-de-sacs," as Solomon describes them, and "never get past this mutual telling of our distress to where it is reflective and ultimately put into a broader perspective."

Context: Neuroscientists have long studied our social brains through the lens of empathy, morality and other processes often by looking at one brain's neural activity during different interactions.

What to watch: Holmstrom and her colleagues propose in a new paper that interpersonal communication scientists could benefit from neuroscience tools to look at the simultaneous brain activity of two people engaged in conversation.

The bottom line: "Collaboration is critical," says Frith. "We have vast amounts of data but not enough theory to understand it."

Read more:
How we talk to each other about the tough stuff - Axios